Metal Spiky Bits

Update

2009-10-26T19:08:00.001-06:00

So that time in every web designers life comes along when they have to decide if they should take the lucrative route or the lots of free time route (this happens about once a year for me). The bad news: as you may have noticed- little to no updates lately! The good news: Work is coming through the cracks in the ceiling! Some paid some not so much

Anyway... not as many posts on the horizon. However, interviews a plenty, lots more metal accessories and more artists on the way.

To tide you over, here's a bizarre YouTube clip. Also, has anyone else noticed weird black metal/kitchen video themed videos from all over the world?

Skeletonwitch Review: Breathing the Fire

2009-10-24T20:33:00.001-05:00

At this point it’s safe to say the thrash metal revival is less of a fad and more of a movement within a genre as witnessed by the continuing and growing interest of fans and the bands that provide them their fix. Skeletonwitch is undeniably one of these bands. Their music and vocals are instantly recognizable, and their killer shows have remained a staple in the metal tour circuit. While their new album, Breathing the Fire, doesn’t exactly break any barriers, it certainly doesn’t disappoint in the thrash department.

The ‘witch’s guitar-centric rampaging melodies topped off with some black-metal vocals are still ever present as in their previous albums, and one can’t deny the skill non-stop touring has brought to the Athens, Ohio boys. Still, the kindling doesn’t quite have the spark from their previous work. Chance Garnette has upped his vocal ability, placing him less in the realm of the mid-west and more in that of Norway, while the rest of the band has certainly upped their game and work more seamlessly than ever.

The band has always been a hodgepodge of genres, and this album adds a few more to the list. From blazing fast tremolo-picking black-metal inspired riffs next to Gothenburg melodic death metal in Repulsive Salvation, or some seriously awe-inspiring double-bass drum action in Released from the Catacombs, there are some breakthrough moments along the way. What it boils down to- and is the essence of Skeletonwitch- is straight up 80s inspired thrash. Pure and simple. They know what they like and what they’re good at and don’t try to push any envelopes or stray too far from the cave of burning skulls they inhabit. Breathing the Fire may play it a little safe, but anyone looking for their next dose of thrash will know where to turn. Besides, the strength of Skeletonwitch has always been in their live shows, and this album is sure to set the place ablaze (I couldn’t resist).

6/10

Metalheads Smarter Than Your Average 5th Grader

2009-10-18T18:46:00.001-05:00

While I've always felt that people who listen to heavy metal are usually smarter than your average joe-on-the-street, I never really had evidence to prove it. Some may write metalheads off as nothing more than Neanderthals incapable of normal human interactions banging away in a chaotic and unorganized manner. Thinking about the composition of say, a Carcass song, the math going on in the head of any progressive drummer, or the preponderance of heavy metal fans in a technology or professional based field never really had me buy into that stereotype. That and everyone I know into metal (including myself TYVM) were far above average in school.

While I'm a little late to the game (this study came out in 2007), there's now scientific evidence from the University of Warwick to show smart kids like the metals.

"Researchers found that, far from being a sign of delinquency and poor academic ability, many adolescent 'metalheads' are extremely bright and often use the music to help them deal with the stresses and strains of being gifted social outsiders...

The researchers surveyed 1,057 members of the National Academy for Gifted and Talented Youth - a body whose 120,000 student members are within the top five per cent academically in the 11-19 age range.

Asked for their favourite type of music, 39 per cent said rock, 18 per cent R&B and 14 per cent pop. Six per cent said heavy metal and a third rated it in their top five genres."

Teenagers specifically named System of a Down, Slipknot, Tool, Dragon Force, Forward Russia and In Flames as their favorite groups, which isn't quite the most respectable metal to listen to, but I'll say better than a large portion of what kids buy into these days.

Full article available here.

Texas State Fair

2009-10-18T17:59:00.002-05:00

Living in Texas my whole life, the State Fair of Texas is synonymous with big hair, big food and big Texans- both wide and tall. In no small part due to its now famous reputation as a premier purveyor of disgustingly creative and gross food. While I don't reside in Dallas anymore, I am seeing messages every day from friends who just ate fried butter, chocolate covered strawberry waffle balls, fried moon pies, or fried coke. I can't say I'm exactly proud to live in a state that boasts its skill in figuring ways to stuff as much saturated fat and sugar into a cubic millimeter as possible, but I can't help but be amused. Is it metal? No, not really. Is it worth sharing with the world for its sheer shock and awe and bemusement? I think so. It's like the A.C. of the food world. I've long since been a fan of the AV Club's Taste Testers and have to pass on some of their results at this years State Fair along with images via Flickr. Overall the food doesn't nearly seem worth it:

"Chicken-fried bacon
This was sold at the same stand where we found the country-fried pork chips, so we picked up a basket. Whoever named these the 2008 Best Taste Winners must have been seriously off their medication; chicken-fried bacon proved to be the very definition of too much of a good thing. The thick-sliced bacon fried in a crazy heavy country batter was so rich that one of our testers could only eat a single slice, and another managed only a single bite. At the risk of offending The A.V. Club’s bacon-is-God readership, this was where bacon jumped the shark. Grade: C-

Fried peanut butter, jelly, and banana sandwich
This Elvisian nightmare, on the other hand, was just disgusting enough to be enjoyable. Since it’s made out of more or less wholesome ingredients, it’s only the frying that makes this 2005 Best Taste Winner into a holy terror: It’s impossibly thick and heavy, about the size of a deep-fried Bible. However, the people behind it are master fryers, and they give it an irresistibly crunchy texture. If you can avoid thinking about what it’s doing to your arteries, it’s absolutely scrumptious. Grade: B+

Country-fried pork chips
Brought to us by the fair’s première vendor of Teutonic Texas treats, these were a resounding success after the disappointment of the corn dog shrimp. Essentially, these were nothing more than very thin, very tender slivers of pork loin, lightly fried and highly seasoned. The server’s suggestion that they be eaten with (shudder) ranch dressing would have ruined what turned out to be one of the lightest, tastiest snacks of the entire fair.Grade: A"

Check out this for more.

Holy Moses Review

2009-10-18T17:45:00.000-05:00

Sabina Classen along with Holy Moses is a force to be reckoned with in metal music. And since I had a brain fart when writing the Women in Metal bits, the least I could do to show a little respect is to review Finished with the Dogs, their second full-length album released in 1987.

First, a little background:
The band was technically formed in 1980 by Jochen Fünders and Ramon Brüssler, who were both out of the band by 1981 an 1986 respectively. Over a series of permutations the only remaining and current member of the band is Sabina, who joined in 1981. The band folded for a short time in the early 90s, but has reformed and released a very respectable album this past year. The heart of Holy Moses reigned from 1981-1994, with husband and wife team of Sabina and Andy Classen, who wrote together and married in 1983 (you may recognize Andy's name from his wide array of producing credits). By 1987 when the album was released, they had just written and released their first solid but not outstanding album, Queen of Siam. I think it's important to remember the context of this album and give it a framework for its time, so here are a few events in Germany and the US in 1987:

WORLD:
- Cold War rages on
- Chernobyl disaster occurred in mid-1986 in the Ukraine, impacting large parts of Germany as well as their parliamentary elections the year after
- Nineteen year-old West German pilot Mathias Rust evades an "impregnable Soviet air defense system" and lands his private plane on the Red Square in Moscow, thereby enabling Gorbechev to speed reform and lead to the end of the Cold War
- Thatcher wins in Britain. Again.
- Europe opens free trade with the Single European Act

US:
- President Reagan challenges Mikhail Gorbachev to tear down the Berlin Wall
- Reagan plays dumb with Iran-Contra affair
- Michael Jackson releases Bad
- Black Monday: US stock market plunges
- The Simpsons first airs
- Cliff Burton dies in 1986 and Metallica essentially along with him

GERMANY:
- Kreator releases Pleasure to Kill in 1986 and Terrible Certainty in 1987
- Accept goes on hiatus. U.D.O. begins
- Sodom releases Persecution Mania, Agent Orange comes out two years later
- Tankard releases Chemical Invasion

1987 was obviously a big year both musically and politically for Germany, and the album reflects much of the frustration of that climate. In the liner notes from the 2005 re-release, Sabina goes into a few of her lyrical concepts for the songs and cements her frustrations with everything from the elite of society, soldiers of fortune and women's lib (which I whole heartedly agree with).

Musically, I have to admit that upon first listen I wasn't immediately taken with it. This seems to be the case with most albums I end up loving and playing until they're worn thin and is such the case here. The album is very 1980s thrash metal and does differ from a large portion of the US thrash or even the current thrash revival. It crosses lines between thrash and speed metal and has definite influences from the NWOBHM.

I think one of the things that makes this album great- and the reason it may not be as easy to jump into right away- is the tempo. Every song is blazing, the vocals are fast yet enunciated and understandable even in German, the solos make my fingers hurt just thinking about it but every note rings clear and unmuddled, and the drums and bass plow through the songs like a chainsaw through butter. That's not to say there's not plenty of breathing room, though. The band sets a song up and then dives right in 90 mph. Though not nearly as fast as today's technical death metal bands, the melodies are turned up quicker than your average 80s thrash album. Because of Sabina's repetitive chorus's, I was reminded on more than one occasion of the mid-80s dis-punk bands. Being one of the Teutonic thrash bands, in the long run they may not have mastered the sound as much as Kreator per say, but hammer the nail on the head in defining shredding guitar solos, raspy vocals and a down-tuned key. I also can't say there's another female singer that has lived up to her in the thrash realm.

Of the 11 tracks and bonus 4 live tracks on the re-release, I can't say I have a favorite song. Some songs are a bit more forgettable than others, but overall each song holds their own. It would be difficult to choose one to remove. Being the sophomore release for the band, they defined their personality musically and have gone on to release eight other studio albums after that. The latest, Agony of Death, still has trademark Holy Moses but has more melody and a slower tempo along with a Gothenburg influence. Finished with the Dogs is no doubt a milestone for not only German metal, women in metal, but also international thrash metal. 5/5.

Immortal Release

2009-10-11T22:27:00.001-05:00

Nuclear Blast has been super pumped about its release of Immortal's All Shall Fall album which has just been released. I don't know if any of you subscribe to any label emails, but I received this list tucked away in one of the daily Nuclear Blast daily's and thought it was pretty interesting. There's some pretty sick packages going on in response to the release as well.

I actually haven't had a chance to listen to it yet and honestly don't know how kosher it is to reprint this, but I thought it was worth a read and found it interesting to compare dates. I also was surprised to see so many Grammy's given away to good bands in Norway as opposed to the fallacy of awards here.

NORWEGIAN BLACK METAL - A BRIEF LOOK AT THE HISTORY OF EXTREME MUSIC

1982 – Britain’s Venom coin the term “black metal” with the release of their album of the same name.

1986 – Mayhem’s now-legendary demo, Pure Fucking Armageddon circulates in the underground.
Black Death is founded; band name is later changed to Darkthrone. 

1987 – Mayhem releases their Deathcrush demo with Swede Sven Erik Kristiansen (aka Maniac) on vocals. 

1988 – Darkthrone records their first demo, Land Of Frost .

1989 – Deathlike Silence Productions is founded by Mayhem’s Euronymous and Yngve Ohlin (aka Dead). Varg “Count Grishnackh” Vikernes (real name: Kristian Vikernes) joins Olve Eikemo (soon to be known as Abbath Doom Occulta) and Harald Nævdal in Old Funeral. 

1990 – Burzum is formed by Count Grishnackh.  

1991 – IMMORTAL releases their self-titled, 3-song EP. Emperor is founded by Samoth. Darkthrone members adopt pseudonyms & record their 2nd album, A Blaze In The Northern Sky. Mayhem’s singer, Dead, commits suicide. Euronymous opens the Helvete record shop in Old Town in Oslo’s East End. Count Grishnackh releases the first instrumental self-titled Burzum demo. Ivar Bjørnson & Grutle Kjellson form Enslaved.  

1992 – IMMORTAL releases Diabolical Fullmoon Mysticism. Deathlike Silence Productions releases Burzum’s self-titled debut album. Enslaved record their first demo, Yggdrasill. Emperor (Samoth, Ihsahn, and Mortiis) releases their Wrath Of The Tyrantdemo. Thirteen churches were burned, ten cases were solved.  

1993 (note: what a year for black metal!!) – IMMORTAL releases Pure Holocaust. Guitarist Silenoz, vocalist Shagrath, and drummer Tjoldav form Dimmu Borgir. Emperor releases self-titled split EP with Enslaved. Mayhem’s line-up (featuring Varg Vikernes) releases De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas. Satyricon releases Dark Medieval Times. Darkthrone releases Under A Funeral Moon. Burzum releases Det Som Engang Var. Euronymous is murdered by Vikernes. Emperor member Bard G. Eithun (aka Faust) murders a gay man. Helvete closes. Ten churches were burned, five cases were solved. Total church burnings to date: 23.

1994 – Emperor releases In The Nightside Eclipse. Darkthrone releases Transylvanian Hunger. Burzum releases Hvis Lyset Tar Oss. Enslaved releases their full-length debut, Vikingligr Veldi and later, Frost. Satyricon releases The Shadowthrone. Gorgoroth releases Pentagram. Dimmu Borgir releases For All Tid. Fourteen churches were burned, seven cases solved. Total church burnings to date: 37.

1995 – IMMORTAL releases Battles In The North. Darkthrone releases Panzerfaust. Satyricon releases their 2nd demo as The Forest Is My Throne – a split with Enslaved that includes their Yggdrasill demo. Seven churches burned, three cases solved. Total church burnings to date: 44.

1996 – Burzum releases Filsofem. Darkthrone releases Total Death and later, Goatlord. Satyricon releases Nemesis Divina. Dimmu Borgir releases Stormblast. Gorgoroth releases Antichrist.

1997 – IMMORTAL releases Blizzard Beasts. Emperor releases Anthems To The Welkin At Dusk. Dimmu Borgir releases Enthrone Darkness Triumphant. Enslaved releases Eld. Burzum releases Daudi Baldrs. Gorgoroth releases Under The Sign Of Hell.

1998 – Dimmu Borgir releases Godless Savage Garden. Enslaved releases Blodhemn. Gaahl joins the Gorgoroth line-up on Destroyer, Or About How To Philosophize With The Hammer.

1999 – IMMORTAL releases At The Heart Of Winter. Emperor’s IX: Equilibrium is released. Satyricon releases Rebel Extravaganza. Dimmu Borgir releases Spiritual Black Dimensions. Darkthrone releases Ravishing Grimness. Burzum releases Hlidskjalf.

2000 – IMMORTAL releases Damned In Black. Mayhem releases Grand Declaration Of War, their first full-length studio album since Euronymous’ murder. Enslaved releases Mardraum. Gorgoroth releases Incipit Satan.

2001 – Emperor disbands. Their last release is Prometheus: The Discipline Of Fire And Demise. Dimmu Borgir releases Puritanical Euphoric Misanthropia. Enslaved releases Monumension. Darkthrone releases Plaguewielder.

2002 – IMMORTAL’s Sons Of Northern Darkness is released. 31,000 copies sell in North America. Satyricon releases Volcanoand Ten Horns - Ten Diadems.

2003 – IMMORTAL disbands. Darkthrone releases Hate Them. Dimmu Borgir releases Death Cult Armageddon. IMMORTAL frontman Abbath appears as guest vocals on the Death Cult Armageddon track: Progenies of the Great Apocalypse. Enslaved releases Below The Lights. Gorgoroth releases Twilight Of The Idols (In Conspiracy With Satan).

2004 – Enslaved releases Isa; wins Norwegian Grammy & Alarm Prize. Darkthrone releases Sardonic Wrath. Mayhem releases Chimera.

2006 – Enslaved releases Ruun; wins Norwegian Grammy for “Best Metal Album.” Darkthrone releases The Cult Is Alive. Gorgoroth releases Ad Majorem Sathanas Gloriam. Satyricon releases Now, Diabolical.

2007 – IMMORTAL reunites for “7 Dates of Blashyrkh”: Sold-out reunion shows in New York and Los Angeles. Darkthrone releases F.O.A.D. (Fuck Off And Die). Dimmu Borgir releases In Sorte Diaboli. Mayhem releases Ordo Ad Chao.

2008 – Darkthrone releases Dark Thrones And Black Flags. Satyricon releases The Age Of Nero. Enslaved releases Vertebrae; win third Norwegian Grammy for “Best Metal Album.”

2009 –Varg Vikernes is released from prison on probation on May 22nd. One church is burned on May 29th. Gorgoroth releases Quantos Possunt Ad Satanitatem Trahunt. IMMORTAL records All Shall Fall with Peter Tägtgren at Abyss Studios. Billboard chart entry predict

Your Scene Sucks

2009-10-11T18:47:00.000-05:00

Just discovered this link doing a little research for the next article. Favorites so far include Crabcore, Indie Jesus, Black Metal Knight, and the #1 Pete Wentz Fan. Good times. Here's a few screenshots.

www.yourscenesucks.com

Metal Artist: Frazetta

2009-10-11T18:29:00.001-05:00

Thinking about Pushead the other night got me to realize that good album artwork is like good pot. The normal stuff will get the job done, but when exceptional it really adds a whole new experience to the music.

But before going any further with album art, I have to talk about Frank Frazetta. Frazetta is to metal art as Iron Maiden is to metal music if you get my drift.

Born in 1928, Frazetta is known for his work with the Conan the Barbarian, Edgar Rice Burroughs books, and other comics of the 50s along with science fiction paintings and posters in the 60s and 70s. What he's best known for and my favorite, are his oil and watercolor paintings. The detail and knowledge of the human physique and muscle structures are unreal, especially since he did it without referencing photography or a model. His sensibility of chiaroscuro, action and fantasy changed art and illustration forever.

While there are a few bands that have used his pieces, including Molly Hatchet, Nazareth, Wolfmother and Dust (who I'm totally not familiar with), I don't think the work has ever been used really appropriately for a bands sound. Frazetta's work is far too brutal for any of those bands, although it is quite atmospheric and uses feathered edges. I count Ed Repka and Andreas Marschall amongst other metal cover artists who have familiarized themselves with his work. Not to mention anyone who has ever looked at a scene in Mordhaus, seen Princess Leia in Return of the Jedi, read Heavy Metal or other Simon Bisley's work, seen a Boris painting, watched Conan, and so on and so forth can thank Frazetta.

There's a great documentary called Frazetta: painting with fire that details his life and shows off some really great work. Here's a video with a great Conan quote and a little Sabbath in the background:

War Master Demo Review

2009-10-11T17:19:00.001-05:00

Sometimes, just when you think everything good in the world is dead and gone the way of the capitalists, some dude comes up and hands you a Bolt Thrower inspired demo- on cassette no less- 'cause he liked your ass flap. Which is how I got my hands on Houston's own War Master demo. Titled Chapel of the Apocalypse, the three-song sampling is some of the gruffest, most raw and rampaging crust inspired ode to Bolt Thrower this side of the Mason-Dixon line.

After drunkenly conversing with Neal the guitarist about out love of Bolt Thrower and hearing how much of an influence they were upon the band (War Master- hello?)- I was really interested to see what they sounded like. Were they a glorified cover band? Did they suck and miss it all together? After all, that is a bold statement to live up to.

So upon listening to the demo, I could definitely hear aspects of Bolt Thrower in the sound. The tuned down, distorted guitars mixed with pinch harmonics and solos along with the blasting drums and death vocals made it obvious who they were listening to. However, what I also heard was a band that didn't work in a vacuum like Bolt Thrower, who essentially created their own sound. This band knew Napalm Death, Entombed, Hell Krusher and I'm sure many more. They didn't solely rely on guitars to drive the sound or the vocals to lay on top, but moved together as one cohesive crusty, sludgy sound. I realized I had something better than an ode to Bolt Thrower, I had the best stenchcore the south has to offer right now.

Which is really something for me personally to get excited about since I would love to live in a city that oozes stenchcore like Portland or places in Canada. It's simply out of the question though after growing up in a humid subtropical armpit known as Houston has left me incapable of living anywhere above the 38th latitude for fear of cold. War Master though, may be able to bring that to me since they're the start to the next Stormcrow/Axe Grinder/Hellshock/Sanctum in my opinion. Hallelujah.

Overall, I can't wait to hear more from War Master. I want to drink 40s with War Master while playing Warhammer 40k all while listening to while listening to the song Warmaster. The melding of Coventry and Houston has some interesting potential and has me ready to sew their patches on my pants with dental floss after I bust a hole in them because I was acting drunk and unruly.

On top of it all, Daniel Shaw (who is also the vocalist) of Secret Tattoo is helping with the artwork. Doesn't get much better than that:

Hail War Master. 4/5 points.

Metal Artists: Pushead

2009-10-08T22:30:00.049-05:00

As I like to do at any given opportunity, I commenced drinking too much at my friend's art opening last night. I then proceeded to throw all my anti-social behavior out the window and begin chatting with random people- as I am prone to do at about five beers in. (Which really isn't all that bad since I've gotten a few friends out of the deal.) Long story short, I complemented a kid on a Pushead shirt and he countered with a confused look on his face.

Pushead is such an integral part in the story of American punk/metal so much so that's he totally a household name. His designs definitely speak for generations of skaters, hessians and punks throughout the 80s, 90s and even today. I can't get over how cool some of this guys stuff is.

Back when the Misfits were actually the Misfits.

Zorlac! Metallica! MRR! Oh my!
I never skated enough to be considered a skater- but dear lord I want one of those decks.

Pushead to Septic Death as John Dyer Baizley is to Baronness.

Couldn't find a good image of this. Made into a sculpture, though. Suhweet.

From Hirax to Christ on Parade, Final Conflict to 16 and everywhere in between. Quite a body of work. What's really great is that he's still doing stuff. Urban Vinyl and other assorted art shows sell out in no time, though.

Pretty cool: Pusheads Top 100

The Problem with Internet Radio

2009-10-05T22:14:00.000-05:00

We all remember when Mp3's and file sharing spread a tsunami-sized wave of change throughout the music world. Record stores died, people quit trading tapes, and stealing music was no big thing. Some things died, other things evolved. One mutation being internet radio.

I'm an avid user of internet radio since I spend a good amount of time parked on my ass in front of a computer screen. I originally began with Pandora. It was clean, easy to use, and I was quite pleased to be able to listen to Sodom next to Pig Destroyer next to Lazarus AD next to Nile all day long. That is, until they put a cap on my consumption. Now I'm at LastFM and boy what a difference.

While it was a little more difficult to get into, Last FM has probably won me over pending any sort of disaster. That said, I still find weird stuff getting into my library and loading glitches every now and then. The two services have their ups and downs. Let's chart it out:

Pandora	Pros: Pause button Clean design Intuitive Layout	Cons: Annoying Ads Dearth of information Crap slips through the cracks
Last FM	Free Free Free Way more information Slideshow Can go back to a song Event Info Cool widgets/interactivity	No pause Not as intuitive Incorrect songs/artists/photos Glitches

All-in-all? Last FM wins. I've had one too many metalcore songs that aren't any good come up through Pandora. Even though Last FM may be a little more complicated and the British spellings throw me off sometimes, it's totally worth it.

Samhain Costumes!

2009-10-02T22:00:00.002-05:00

For some reason I'm really looking forward to Halloween this year. Eh... who am I kidding? I look forward to Halloween every year. Although not nearly as fun as when I was a kid, it's still pretty much my favorite holiday. So I've started jogging my memory for costumes. Last year I was Wednesday Addams. I pulled it off a little toooo well. Here are a few ideas for this year:

Beavis and/or Butthead.
This costume would be super fun. Get baked out of my skull and laugh just a little more than I usually do. AND I have an excuse to finally say, "teepee for my bunghole!" all day long.

Glenn Danzig circa Misfits era.
Although I'm already a bit much too tall for this to be accurate, but my devilock would be killer. I would also get to use my Glenn Danzig voice and sing goofy lyrics. I may or may not wear a mesh top for this one just to incorporate some of his solo career. Other than that, costume is ready to go.

Any one of the members of Nitro.
I wouldn't know where to start to get my hair that big and pretty sure I'd cause internal bleeding wearing my pants that tight, but look at these guys. That is a party waiting to happen.

Snow White.
Apples, singing, little miners. Banking on the irony factor here, but who wouldn't want to see Snow White get drunk and act crazy on Halloween?

Marie Antoinette.
Or to clarify, a dead Marie Antoinette. What an awesome get up. It'd be fun to be the epitome of class enemy for a night.

And that's about it. There's a few others but these are definitely in the running unless I get thrown a curve ball and end up doing a duo-costume with someone. We'll have to wait and see.

Loose Ends

2009-10-01T22:06:00.000-05:00

*Let it be said this list is in no particular order. Amen.*

From the actual musicians to the record execs and right down to the girl running the merch booth, there are women sprinkled all throughout metal music. Whatever the style- death, melodic death, black, thrash, grindcore, symphonic, heavy, doom- some chick has found a way to kick its ass and looking hot doing it.

This list only profiled a few of my favs. There's more than a few I've remembered along the way (or completely forgotten and been reminded) but haven't profiled, and way more than that who deserve mention. So below are a few loose ends that I lost along the way.

P.S.- Also, does anyone know of a chick in a progressive band?? I can't for the life of me think of or find a progressive metal chick without getting too symphonic. After Forever looks like the closest one (Dasher- I think the chick from Imperia might have Floor beat in terms of size. Floor is still hotter, though. :)

MEL MONEGAN
I held out as long as I could. Mel's number is up!

First off, props to Mel for probably being the truest of all the ladies mentioned. The emotion this woman carries through with her vocals is unreal. There's no fame. No glamor (yet her hair always looks good- how's she do that?? I demand to know). And I'm pretty sure I'd want this lady on my side in a fight. Just sayin'. I started out writing this comparing her to Napalm Death, grindcore history, yadda yadda yadda... Fuck that! Listen to the music.

PS- Noticed FTF will be at MDF. OMFG.

SAMANTHA ESCARBE
Doom and gloom

Virgin Black's sound is quite different than any band on the list so far. Almost so much that they shouldn't be on it. They make Epica look like Napalm Death they're so slow. Where they do fit and why Samantha is included, is because they're the next step in a symphonic/gothic/doom lineage from bands like My Dying Bride and Anathema. Their mix of classical music and gothic/doom metal always make me want to go out and buy myself a frilly black skirt and get crazy with the liquid eyeliner. Peers of Opeth, the band was started by Escarbe and deserves mention.

JUSTINE "Juice" ÉTHIER

Finally!

Yay! Finally! A drummer! I'm so glad someone called me out on this one. I couldn't think of a single drummer unless it was a cover band, a local band, or some other band that wasn't metal. I'm relatively new to Blackguard, but Mr. Metal Bits won't shut up about them. I've been listening to more of them and I have to admit that this story is about right- they may have won a contest but their energy is great and the keyboards remind me it's almost mead drinkin' season! The synchronized headbanging to pure pagan metal doesn't hurt either. I'll definitely be harassing Justine when she and Ensiferum make it to Austin this November! At that I'm determined to take this woman's picture live. She's elusive like that.

And... that about wraps up the list- at least for now. I've researched a couple other hotties but feel like this rundown has a decent representation of the vast majority of sub-genres without getting too repetitive or into too much cheese. Working on a review for Holy Moses since I blanked on that one for some reason.

Music and War

2009-09-30T13:15:00.000-05:00

Just read this article the other day about soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan and the role of mp3 players in combat. After a bit of research, Jonathan Pieslak, a researcher at the City College of New York found that Slayer, Metallica, Eminem, Lil' John and others top soldiers playlists. More than that researchers are looking into the relationship between music and the transcendent power in war.

I'm stating the obvious, but if you've ever driven your car way too fast, been in a fight, or done some other daredevil adrenaline-pumping activity, you're not going to want feely emo music behind you. You want something that keeps up with your heartbeat, that syncs with the intensity of the situation, that makes you feel big. It's the same thing as pumping yourself up to music before competing in a sporting event, playing a show or some other big event. It takes your mind off the nerves and focuses them on the prize. In this case, kill or be killed.

While I understand what he's studying goes further than the heaviness of the music and into a far deeper psychological triggers, I have to say that before iPods there were cassette decks, before that 8 tracks and so on and so forth until you get the band on the battlefield with their horns and drums. Any major conflict pretty much has a setlist to go with it. Vietnam, WWII, the American Revolution, soldiers had music guiding them the whole way, so it's nothing new.

Another given is that these guys are stressed out. Probably ill-trained and ill-equipped. They need everything short of going into the Berzerker state to do what they've been told to do. I don't think it's a cause and effect tying music to violence. I think it's a symptom of the human psyche under extremely stressful conditions. Maybe it's more important to find music that helps heal rather than music that adds fuel to the fire.

The link in totality:
iPods In Iraq: Soldiers' MP3s An Instrument Of War

#9 13

2009-09-28T21:53:00.000-05:00

*Let it be said this list is in no particular order. Amen.*

13
Gone in a flash

There's something undeniably intriguing about bands such as 13. Never releasing a full-length album and on the edge of obscurity, they could be categorized as a thing of the past if it weren't for the fact that over seventeen years after the band began, people still get excited talking about them. The raw, course, thick, heavy, unapologetic sound of Alicia Morgan's vocals, Liz Buckingham's guitar, Ellen Mieczkowski drums and some guy named Sean on bass would make it hard to believe that on the other side of the country bands like L7 and Bikini Kill were in the middle of the "grunge" scene. Go figure.

While the band broke up mid-way through 1993, just over a year since forming, they played with Misery, Chaos UK, Cathedral, Pentagram, Incantation and of course had the obvious ties to Eyehategod and Grief. Liz Buckingham went on to Sourvein for two full-lengths and then onto the well-know Electric Wizard, honing her 70s psychedelic stoner doom aesthetic.

13 makes the list for the same reason people remember them now- somewhere between the sludge of New Orleans and the crust of New York, between Amebix and Sabbath, between what people expect and what's real- lies 13.

Two words: discography please!

13 minutes:

MSB: The Kylesa Interview

2009-09-26T23:23:00.006-05:00

When I wrote this a few weeks ago, I was well aware that Kylesa was on tour and would soon be swinging through Austin. The band frequents the area and most people have seen them over a dozen times, so seeing Kylesa isn't exactly a new thing. They're always great to see regardless of the circumstances and always draw a pretty good size crowd, but their new material had me eagerly awaiting.

It was only hours before the show that the idea dawned on me that I should do an interview with them (after all, I'm the album's biggest cheerleader, right?), specifically guitarist and vocalist Phillip Cope. I approached it similarly to how I approached things with my zine in high school: get nice and buzzed and then go right up and ask for an interview. I'd like to think being a girl helps this angle. Somehow the stars aligned and seconds later I found myself sitting down for a nice chat about the new album. Maybe it was the slight southern accent, but Phillip was laid-back, amicable, and made me like the band that much more. Check out the interview and show review after the jump:

To start things off, the live show was great. And I'm not just saying that. The only thing better than Static Tensions is Static Tensions live with two drummers, two Gibsons, and a set of Krank amps behind 'em. Other than a few timing and vocal issues (hello douchebag up front), they nailed the album. While they may not have explored all the possibilities two drummers brings to the ball game like poly-rhythms or complex time signatures, the sheer power they brought undeniably engaged people and ensured plenty of head bobbing and foot tapping. It was as if the entire crowd was in a wave at times. If you can, go check them out. But enough of that. Onto the interview:

A: So you guys are playing the whole Static Tensions album this tour?
P: This is the first night we’re doing it. We had to start a little later than we expected in practicing it, so we’ve been practicing it as we go.

A: First night? Wow.
P: Yeah. And we’ve never done that with an album before. We’re trying to get all the samples and everything just like the album as much as we can. Tonight’s the first night, so it’s going to be a little imperfect.

A: Why Austin?
P: Honestly, it just worked out that this was where we were most comfortable to start doing it.

A: I’m sure it’s uncomfortable for any band to go out and play an entire album, so what about this album needed to be played live?
P: Really, because we felt like we could. We wrote that album as if it was a live set when we were writing it and putting it together, so we kinda had that in mind before it was done. It feels like, we can’t play it perfectly like it is in a studio, but we can play it. There’s no filler tracks, there’s no weird studio experimentation. It’s all songs that we could play.

A: So going in you wanted a live set album you could translate to a show.
P: Well, mainly it was just thinking about playing a show. How songs work in a live situation, and let’s try to write an album that would work as a live situation. Think about putting it together the same way we would put together a set live. In the beginning we never though we’d be actually playing the whole thing out, and the only reason we are is because of the response we’ve gotten from people. Everybody’s asked to hear every song on the album. That’s never happened to us before. People are like, “I liked this song, or this song,” and we’ve always listened to our fans. If our fans say they like this song then that’s what we play. This is the first album we’ve ever written where every song has been requested at some point.

A: So how long did it take to write?
P: It took a few months. Writing and recording about 4.5 or 5 months.

A: Recording for this must’ve been really important. I think because of the two drums.
P: Yeah, we did a lot of experimentation trying to figure out how to get it right.

A: Is it easy to write now? Are you guys in tune with one another?
P: Well, with Laura, we’re just more comfortable letting each other do their own thing. We don’t question each other as much. We’re comfortable enough with each other’s influences where we just kinda let it go. She comes to me and tells me she wants to try something and I don’t really stand in her way. I say, “Ok, well, let’s try this out,” even if I don’t fully understand it at first, and likewise.

A: So how did you decide as a band to get another drummer in there?
P: Well, we’d actually wanted to do that from the beginning of the band, and we tried at the very beginning to have two drummers. Because we were starting out, having two drummers didn’t really work out together, and we didn’t really know how we were going to be able to tour with that, so we just found ourselves in a situation where we thought maybe we could start pulling this off. It was a learning experience. We’re still learning. We’re still figuring this out as we go.

A: I was wondering if it made practice and rehearsal time double. Did those two guys get together?
P: Well, we’ve had several different second drummers. We’ve had the same, main drummer for a couple albums now. He writes all the music with us, and he writes with a second drummer in mind, so he leaves that space. Then the second drummer would come in, and he would direct him to where the parts are and what he thinks he should do, and they get together and jam together.

A: My friend wants to know if your first drummer’s single.
P: Uhhhh… which one

A: I don’t know. She couldn’t remember his name.
P: Probably not.

A: Ha. So moving on... I’m a big fan of Damad. How would you say that Kylesa and Damad are different?
P: For me it doesn’t feel a huge amount different, just because I’ve always kinda done what I wanted to do as a guitar player. So I’ve done that in Damad.

A: Ohh it’s Damad (DAM-ed).
P: That’s how we say it

A: I’ve been mispronouncing it (saying Duh-mahd).
P: No, people can say Damad. Most people say Damad. We always said Damad. It just kinda turned into Damad. We don’t care. (Confusing. I know. You’d have to be there)

A: I never knew.
P: Anyways, the difference is with Kylesa I have to keep vocals in mind. I’m not just a guitar player. I have to keep that in mind. That’s the biggest difference. I could get a little weirder and stranger with my guitar playing in Damad. In Kylesa I have to keep in mind there’s a good portion of the songs I’ll be singing on. I can’t get too weird.

A: It seems like in both, Laura and Victoria in the beginning kinda took a step back on vocals, and as you guys progressed and got more comfortable there was more time spent on vocals. Would you say that is about right?
P: Well, it’s just learning. It’s having experience and going, “Ok. I just pulled this off. Let’s see what else I can pull off.” It’s getting comfortable and pushing yourself each album. I know for her, on the next album she’ll probably push herself even more. See what else she can pull off.

A: I love it, “The next album,” so are you guys done? What’s your plan? Are you writing?
P: We start writing in December. We’re really excited. We have lots of ideas. I love touring. I have a blast touring, but I can’t wait to get started on this album.

A: I’m wondering about your collaboration with John Dyer Baizley for the cover. Did you come to him with an idea?
P: Well, we gave him the lyrics, and he just based the artwork off the lyrics. I felt like he did a great job with that. We didn’t let him hear any music. I think he picked up on everything that’s represented in there. The only thing, is that in the original I had a little different thought on the logo color scheme. I kinda requested a different one. I felt it fit the mood a little better, but other than that.

A: So what’s in the water in Georgia? It seems like you and it seems like a bunch of people are getting to the point now in their careers that they can influence music, and there’s a definite sound.
P: Boredom I think. I think it’s a good town. There’s not a lot going on. Just go and focus. Everybody we know focuses real hard and works real hard. It’s not like there’s this huge social network where there’s parties every night or shows every night. There’s really none of that, so it really helps to just focus.

A: What kind of stuff do you listen to?
P: I listen to all kinds of stuff. I don’t really have a “favorite genre” of music. I maybe just have favorite bands from different genre’s of music. I’m kinda schizophrenic with my music. One minute I’ll be blasting nothing but death metal and I’ll listen to that all day long, and at nighttime I’ll listen to some chill indie rock type stuff. It doesn’t feel weird to me. I just base my music on my mood. Sometimes I’m in a mood for progressive music, and sometimes I’m in a mood just to chill. I love different types of music for different reasons. I kind find merit in lots of different things.

A: I think that comes through because it seems every review I’ve ever read, it’s “Kylesa. You know, they’re kind of metal and kind of progressive and kind of this and kind of punk and kind of that,” so how would you describe it? Do you care? Do you give a shit?
P: I don’t give a shit. We do what we want to do, and if it comes out weird or uncategorized then so be it. You know? We just kinda always figured that there has to be people like us that do listen to all kinds of different things and don’t really care where music fits in. We’ve not judgmental to our audience at all. It doesn’t bother us where you come from or what your background is or what you do for a living. That doesn’t matter to us. If you find something of merit in our music and you enjoy it then great. So I don’t really feel like we have to play music for a “type” of person.

A: It seems like to me Kylesa is getting more of an older crowd than an average show crowd, does it seem that way?
P: It’s getting that way, but I think we do have a younger crowd, too. It just keeps being that we get stuck playing 21 and up shows. We haven’t figured out a way to get shows that cater to younger people. I don’t know why that is, but we just keep doing tours that generally, 21+. I think that has a lot to do with it. We get a lot of younger people that write to us, so that’s how we know they’re listening.

A: I saw you guys at SXSW and there were tons of young people. That was really great.
P: We really need to do a tour where we play earlier shows that cater to younger people.
A: Well, I think that’s about all I have man.
P: Cool.
A: Good interview. Good album. Good luck tonight.
P: Well, thanks a lot for taking the time.

New Look

2009-09-26T18:53:00.005-05:00

As you may have noticed, things have gotten a bit more err.... green around here. I'm not quite sure if I like it yet and still have a few tweaks to go, but want to know what you think! Awesome? Lame? About a shitty as the best dethcore band? Any widgets or functionality that would zazz it up?

Comments are now free to everyone, and you can even post anonymously if you're a huge pussy.

Real Programmers Wear Corpsepaint

2009-09-25T21:35:00.001-05:00

In keeping with the ridiculous nature of this blog at times, I had to post these.

As a vegetarian this is just the thing I need to keep convincing people that not eating meat must be the work of Satan,

and as a web designer this is just the thing I need for casual Fridays. That and even more weird stares from my co-workers. "Ping" yourself one up today!

Now... onto Friday night Wow-ing!

#7 & #8 Doro and Angela

2009-09-23T21:28:00.002-05:00

*Let it be said this list is in no particular order. Amen.*

Doro and Angela.
Integral.

Doro Pesch and Angela Gossow. Leaving these two (and a few others even) out of the list would kind of be like writing a book about American history and then not mentioning Ben Franklin or JFK. They're too big not to be noticed. Both from Germany, both blonde, and both great fucking vocalists, without them I think it would be quite a bit more difficult for female metal musicians to be accepted (and it's not like they're fully accepted as it is).

In my mind these two are milestones along the way in metal. Their vocal capabilities and styles are at opposite ends of the spectrum, but I think it's pretty obvious they're not just another girlfriend in the band- they're in it for the music. Doro of course has been around forever and formerly of Warlock, and Angela began with Asmodina and then Mistress. What followed for her with Arch Enemy has got to be one of the most financially successful metal bands currently hands down. In my mind they began creating what Carcass would have thanks to the writing of Michael Amott.

Sure Angela's lyrics are corny at times and Doro's music can err on the glam/rock side (but she did a duet with Lemmy! Suhhweet). Say what you will, but at the end of the day I'd be a moron to not at least give these two credit where it's due.

Cheers to Germany!

Until the Light Takes Us

2009-09-22T20:27:00.004-05:00

I first saw headlines for the documentary Until the Light Takes Us about a month ago. I was mildly intrigued, but after watching an interview with the filmmakers I quickly decided it was just the same story we've all heard about Norwegian black metal regurgitated once more. B-o-r-i-n-g.

However, I just caught the preview and resolved that the film may have more to offer than I previously had assumed. After all, I would honestly probably get around to seeing it regardless if it was crap. Show me new footage or a color photos I haven't seen before and I'm there... I'm also not your average audience. I'm weird like that.

Here's the preview:

Still. I can't help but ask myself why- nearing twenty years after the church burnings- are people still talking about this? It's almost as if it's hitting the US for the first time today. I have to think that there's a few reasons behind why there's continued interest in this sort of thing and what made people feel motivated to talk about it again. Here's a few ideas:

1) Religion. The sheer size and depth of the christian religion is astounding. An interest in those who would- god forbid- believe anything other than what they've been told to believe creates an automatic audience and interest.

2) People need things to hate. It makes us feel unified.

3) It's provocative. If you've never seen a guy in corpse paint cut himself on stage it's exciting and new.

4) The music still carries on. Black metal is not a fleeting moment in the history of music. It's growing and changing and evolving and always has. The story of black metal is still relevant.

5) FENRIZ INTERVIEWS. Hellloooo. Enough to get me in the seat.

6) These acts had methodology behind them. They weren't a lovers quarrel. It wasn't over money or greed or lust or the normal things people act out upon, yet they weren't sociopaths, either. All was contained within a sub-society with their own ethics, codes and morals. I'd like to think people want to live vicariously through that to an extent.

7) Varg Vikernes. I think everyone I know dislikes or doesn't given two flying fucks about Varg. Even the people I've talked to (in my drunken haze, thank you) from Scandinavia dismiss him. This doesn't mean he's not still the poster boy for a certain aspect of extreme thought/behavior/outspokenness. Kind of like Britney Spears in her sloppy faze. Oh I miss those days.

8) People like eating popcorn.

9) It's going to have a killer soundtrack!

The interviews with the filmmakers are like I said, complete wastes of time, but here's a clip of guess who:

"We're not living in a fucking trailer camp just listening to Anthrax." Here here. I do enjoy some throbbing tetchno, myself.

#6 Scatha

2009-09-22T17:57:00.007-05:00

*Let it be said this list is in no particular order. Amen.*

Scatha.
The early 1980s- chick style.

There's a certain amount of intrigue for me personally when it comes to the topic of South America. The relatively unknown nature of the continent to most North Americans along with its economics, history of social activism, military coups, and the fact that nowhere else in the world is "Iron Maiden as religion" taken quite so seriously makes it one of the more interesting cultures for me.

So when I stumbled upon Scatha, an all-girl thrash band reigning from Rio de Janeiro, they were already off to a good start before I even heard the music. Then I listened and they instantly became a favorite. Not to be confused with this Scatha (from Scotland and also quite good, actually), the 5-piece, who individually couldn't be any older than 20 years old, crank out some very solid riffs in my opinion. The guitarist obviously really liked early Megadeth, and I can't help but make the obvious comparison that Sepultura has made some sort of an impact on them. I just realized that the vocals remind me of Obituary: both sung in another language. Hah. Each song is uniquely different, and I'm impressed in their song structure and timing this early on in their "career" (and look at 'em. They're adorable. C'mon.)

From what I've seen of live videos, the girls haven't quite mastered the art of stage presence and don't appear totally comfortable. But then again, they are, like, teenagers, so I'll give them a pass. I really hope these girls stay with music, keep getting better, get some support, and take over the world Dethklok style.

#5 Astarte

2009-09-19T18:23:00.004-05:00

*Let it be said this list is in no particular order. Amen.*

Astarte
Three for the price of one.

Greece isn't exactly known for its heavy metal exports, and chicks aren't exactly known for getting together and deciding to form black metal bands, so how Astarte even came into existence is a little like pondering how the people who built Stonehenge moved 4 ton bluestones from 240 miles away.

Circa Demonized era.

Astarte would be a good band even if they were aliens from outerspace. The fact that they're all-female and are named after a god of fertility, sexuality, and war only pushes them over the edge. Even though the only remaining and seminal figure is Tristessa, Astarte has always centered around being an all-female band save a few session drummers and exceptions.

Early days.

The early Astarte sound was more your "typical" Scandinavian black metal, but as the years have progressed the sound is far more melodic and death driven. What's more is that the band, Tristessa especially, has always owned their looks while presented a strong female archetype. They let their femininity fly but come off looking more like female warriors than porn stars- and I can't imagine many guys can complain about that.

Tristessa

Metal Accessories: Drinking Horns

2009-09-19T18:12:00.000-05:00

Group identity helps reinforce culture. It guides behavior, helps dictate speech and the ideas of right and wrong. Facets of the heavy-metal subculture share group identity through shared uniform (i.e.- hair, black shirts, etc.), music, ritual (headbanging, drinking, trading albums, etc.) and other similarities. Within the genre however, there are sub-genres such as viking, thrash, black, symphonic, speed, death, doom, and a variety of others that have their own unique traits and identity standards. Thus, the heavy metal accessory is born.

The first accessory I'll mention is the drinking horn. Although extremely limited to the Viking/pagan metal genre, the drinking horn is certainly the most historic metal accessory around (except perhaps having long hair). Long before Budweiser began bottling beer, people used their own ceramic, wood or at times metal vessels believe it or not. So why go through the trouble of hollowing bone marrow from a horn, then coating it with a beeswax or other lacquer-type substance to prevent seepage?

Well, for one, it looks fucking awesome. For another, it's not like these horns were an everyday part of life for people. As you may have noticed, horns aren't exactly designed to be set down unless you have a stand for them. Not to mention for the amount of weight and space they take up there's relatively little volume. Then there's the issue of smell. I don't know about all drinking horns, but the two I've bought have a certain... odor. Kinda like that of a dead cow, come to think of it. A whif of that with a gulp of beer is only for the most brutal of hessians!

Historically, horns were only used for special occasions or by those with status or rank (same applies today har har). Some you'll see have special engravings or ornamentation in primarily gold but also silver, or bronze.

Probably the most historical drinking horns are the two found at the site of Sutton Hoo near Suffolk, England- the site of early 7th, late 6th century burial sites found in the early 20th century. One of which contained a Viking ship and some serious treasure- including two drinking horns from now extinct aurochs.

The translation from historical Viking society to modern-day hessian society is pretty easy to trace. As an ode to Thórr was made before drinking mead from horns in ancient times, there's plenty of odes to Thor in viking metal and drinking in modern times.

Hávamál:
Thórr said:
Tell me, Alvís - for all wights' fate
I deem that, dwarf, thou knowest -
how the ale is hight, which is brewed by men,
in all the worlds so wide?

No Post Tonight

2009-09-18T07:43:00.003-05:00

I've got to get this list out of my system... but not tonight:

Not a fan of Emo's, just the weekend (especially this one!). Gotta work on my sneer before I go.

#4 Susan Gerl

2009-09-16T20:32:00.005-05:00

*Let it be said this list is in no particular order. Amen.*

Susan Gerl.
7 strings, bitches!

So let's see here... two vocalists and one bass player so far. Now all we need is a keyboardist and maybe a few groupies and that should pretty much sum up chicks in metal. Yup. Sad 'cause it's true.

Until Susan Gerl comes in with her Ibanez S-7320 and kinda blows that out of the water...

Not only does she look like Donna from That 70s Show, but she writes some killer riffs.

Recently joining up with God Dethroned, Susan has definitely reached a new level in her career. Former the guitarist for Cliteater and Murder Syndicate, her sound is heavily based in early Carcass and Entombed, but not so technical that she can't let a note hang. Passiondale (Passchendaele), the first album with God Dethroned, came out earlier this year and will definitely be on my favorite-albums-of-the-year list.

Susan's definitely on the list because she makes it look so damn easy. It's like the guitar just floats to her fingers. I honestly can't think of another lead female guitarist that writes any-way-yo-slice-it brutal death metal and doesn't need a ridiculous gag to fall back on to be a great musician! Hail Susan!

What Would Wattie Do?

2009-09-14T22:44:00.004-05:00

"My country fights for independence and all I got was this lousy t-shirt."

Ran across this photo the other day as part of BBC photo essay on people displaced from fighting in East Timor as part of nationwide riots that swept the nation in 2006.

I can't quite tell what album image it is on his shirt, but I wonder what he would think of the lyrics.

#3 Katherine Katz

2009-09-14T22:16:00.004-05:00

*Let it be said this list is in no particular order. Amen.*

Katherine Katz.
Tiny lady big noise.

It's always exciting to listen to a band, begin a relationship with the musicians over a few albums, not knowing what they look like, and then see them live. In a weird way, it's like getting to know a character in a favorite novel and then going to see the adaptation on screen. Never quite what I saw in my mind.

Like Katherine Katz. If I had my pick of what the vocalist for Salome and now part-vocalist for Agoraphobic Nosebleed (yay Agorapocalypse!) looked like, it probably wouldn't be a petite blonde chick with fair complexion. Call me crazy, but the volume of crazy vicious sounds that erupt from her are more apt for a possessed savage. Which is probably why she's #3 on the list.

Though relatively new on the scene, I love that she thoroughly owns it and obviously enjoys what she's doing. Letting her growl make up for any sort of supposed uniform, look, attitude or whatever it is that people like me think vocalists should look like.

#2 Simone Simons

2009-09-12T15:00:00.005-05:00

*Let it be said this list is in no particular order. Amen.*

Simone Simons.
Cleavage and keyboards.

On the other side of the metal spectrum from death metal and Jo Bench, lies symphonic metal and Simone Simons. While her band isn't exactly revolutionizing music, and she doesn't have as much street cred as Jo, I'd be a moron not to put her in the list. In the land of heavy metal not many chicks come around that look like her. Hell, that could be said for any land, really. I want to hate Simone in all honesty. She gets to play music for a living, has an amazing vocal talent, and was blessed with crazy red hair. The thing is, she looks so nice I don't think I can hate her, and with her unfortunate health news in 2008 I think I'd sooner bake her cookies than want to kick her ass.

At least in America, I wouldn't say your average metal head listens to symphonic metal. I'll take it in from time to time, but the genre seems reserved for fans of Buffy the Vampire Slayer or people in certain European countries. It's safe to say however, that Simone Simons' looks have certainly given her band some notice, and perhaps not all for the music.

Metal Movie Madness: Eat the Rich

2009-09-12T14:59:00.000-05:00

Somewhere in all the hullabaloo of Reaganomics, Bush 41, Gulf War 1, Bush 42, and the Iraq War we forgot what helped along all this punk/metal nonsense: class war! It certainly isn't what it used to be. Instead of tea parties there were riots and boycotts. We hated the Russians and Cubans more than the Iraqi's. The word Shiite hadn't yet made it to NPR, and the record companies were throwing money at some chick named Debbie instead of some chick named Britney.

That's why watching films in the thralls of Thatcher-ism is so enjoyable and yet complete alien to the world today. In the year 1987, one movie set had the likes of Lemmy, Paul McCartney and Shane MacGowan all on the same movie set. I can imagine the parties were a sight to behold. The cast lists notable names to go onto bigger and better things in the British comedy realm, and the movie has to rest its laurels on plot as opposed to CGI. Who knew?

Eat the Rich is a 90 minute tromp through the class war of the 1980s London, set to a Motörhead soundtrack. The band (with Animal) makes a few cameos and Lemmy even has a minor-role playing the antagonists cronies.

For any Motörhead fan, British comedy fan, or anyone wanting to reminisce over the 1980s, this movie is a must!!

**** 4/5 "Good enough to buy"

#1 Jo Bench

2009-09-10T22:13:00.000-05:00

*Let it be said this list is in no particular order. Amen.*

Jo Bench.
Two words: Bolt. Thrower.

While they were signed to Earache Records, Jo was one of, if not the only woman on the entire label. Pretty impressive (and rather sad) considering they only switched to Metal Blade in the mid-90s. To be part of the core group of a hugely influential and yet underrated death metal bands says quite a lot. To hear stories about Jo (who is quite short) fight off skinheads by hitting them with her bass during a huge brawl, then getting up and doing it again the next day, puts her into the hottest women of metal list!

The best part about Jo Bench is that she's all street cred. You're not going to find her on the cover of Decibel wearing a corset or going past anything but her trademark hair and eyeliner. She gets sweaty, rocks the fuck out, and lets the bass do the talking. Enough said.

Metal Chicks

2009-09-10T21:49:00.000-05:00

Heavy metal is no doubt a glorification of masculinity in its finest. The culture reeks of metaphors for war, power, strength, and the sanctification of the alpha male. It's a great way for anyone to escape into a world which may be 180 degrees different from their own. As a girl, I have to question any chick that can't appreciate a buff dude in tight pants getting sweaty... okay... sorry. Went into a little daydream there. Heh. Can't help it.

ANYWAY. I could sit here all day and name off my favorite heavy metal musicians and my favorite outfits they wear. If you're a heterosexual male this may do absolutely nothing for you and may be mildly offending. So, in an effort to not make people vomit, I bring to you the hottest women in metal. As told by a girl.

I do have to consider the relationship of men and women for a moment before getting into the list, however. First, I must admit that of all the body parts out there, breasts are the highest grossing. I'm not exactly sure why- I'd put a few others at the top- but if there's boobs involved chances are one of you guys will take notice and spend money for it even. For my list, I'm really just concerned with the waist upwards. Most importantly:
1) Talent. Just because you have said breasts doesn't make you special.
2) Honesty. Do you actually care about the music or is it because your boyfriend is in the band.
3) Hotness. I need a certain je ne sais quoi. Not just a tube top.

Let's begin.

The Trouble with Metal

2009-09-10T20:59:00.002-05:00

The general public never cease to amaze me; which actually isn't that amazing considering the bullshit the general public buys on a daily basis. I try very hard to shelter myself from the ignorance of humanity but at times that sludge slips through the cracks. Perhaps you've had a similar experience.

It always tickles me when people find out you're interested in metal. Most of the time they decide they're going to impress you with their front-row tickets to see ACDC in 2001, or how the top of their Camaro back in the day was an ode to ZZ Top. Their concept of metal stops at the top-40 oldies stations. Which, in all actuality, isn't so bad. I love those most of those bands, so shooting the shit with some guy about his concept of "heavy metal" isn't so bad. Except when they assume heavy metal stops at Ozzy Osbourne.

On the flip side are the people with the Mtv version of metal. This chaps my ass enough to write a blog entry about it, dammit. The people who saw "bands" like Insane Clown Posse, Korn, and whatever the hell else is on white trash trailer park kids' shirts (no slight to trailer park kids. just people that can't think) come from the depths of submissiveness to spawn a breed of big-pants, torn-shirt, gelled-hair followers to the pied piper of "heavy metal." I'd rather be stereotyped as a goth so help me than assume this fate. At least goths were the original losers and I won't get asked to sell someone meth later. You know the music industry is dead when...

/rant

My point is, the entire world has no clue that metal exists. And I like it that way. I want to keep it that way. Having every-day American man tell you his concept of music and then comparing that to your own really puts into perspective just how big, and yet silent the culture is.

Know what I mean?

Howl Interview

2009-09-06T13:55:00.003-05:00

The Howl interview is up and posted at Direct Metal Music.

The band has just been added to the lineup for MDF so I'm very stoked about that. Here's the intro:

As the saying goes, good things come in small packages. In the case of Howl, really freaking awesome things come in tiny packages. The four piece hailing from Providence, Rhode Island has just released a 3-song EP of sludge like-thrash if you will, with Relapse Records. The sound is sprinkled with just a touch of black metal for good measure and keeps your

interest all the way through as they weave in and out of thick southern doom to high voltage thrash. Whether they know it or not, these guys (and gal) incorporate a lot of ideas and somehow manage to pack a ton into just shy of 14 minutes. From the chugging of the guitars to the blackened vocal screams, everyone will be able to relate to some aspect of the sound. There's no easy way to describe it other than damn heavy. The sound casts a wide net as any fan from Kyuss to Slayer will find a middle ground.

The band has come out swinging and created quite an abuzz upon the metal world. It's really no wonder. Upon first listening one of my first thoughts was, "Where the hell has THIS been hiding." My only complaint is that next time instead of just three songs, Howl needs to release a 14-track album with a extra video and tshirt of more of the same.
Check out the interview with Timmy who plays- nay, kills- kit for the band here.

Weekend Nachos Review

2009-08-29T17:07:00.003-05:00

As seen at Direct Metal Music

Twenty-three minutes. Twelve songs. A breakdown-heavy, D-beat sprinkled testament to American hardcore today pretty much sums up the newest incantation of Chicago based Weekend Nachos.

Unforgivable is the bands second full-length, and the first release since Relapse records picked them up earlier this month. I’d say that’s a good move on Relapse’s part since Weekend Nachos sit right on the threshold of the present-day hardcore movement, especially since being featured in the notable This Comp Kills Fascists compilation earlier this year.

Building on the groundwork laid by 90s hardcore, the band certainly isn’t recreating the wheel in any way. That’s not to say however, that the heavily distorted, rampaging blast of fury doesn’t get the job done. The album’s intro track, 2009, easily sets the pace for the rest of the album, which hits its stride by the fifth track, A Few Blocks South. The songs easily tie together working the breakdowns next to break-neck speed rising and falling with each song. By the eighth track, Rejected Psychopath, however, the band has mastered the art of distortion feedback and falls back on its breakdowns a little too much, losing its momentum.

While the album isn’t as aggressive or inventive as its freshman release (Punish and Destroy) and has more than a few forgettable tracks, the vocals and energy are consistent with a good mix of breakdowns in between, making this album easy to play again and again.

6.5/10

Black Metal

2009-08-29T12:28:00.004-05:00

Like any good American, I turn to Google to answer all of life's mysteries. From asking "What's the best vegan brownie recipe?" (Answer: It doesn't exist. Use eggs you moron), to "How do I move to Norway?" (Answer: Riding the socialized health care train. Duh.) But sometimes, I stumble across an unexpected gem. Like Black Metal, a comic co-created by writter Rick Spears and illustrator Chuck BB.

The tale features two brothers and their adventures through the hallways of school to the depths of hell and everywhere in between. This comic is oozing with comedic references only someone with knowledge of the kvlt would get, which makes it that much cooler.

The illustration style is similar to Scott Pilgrim, but as you would assume, is all in black graphic style. While it may seem the two teenage boys are just your average all-things-black obsessed kids, the story quickly takes an abrupt turn to the glorious dark side.

Although the story is in one of those ancient technologies of flat, reading type format, I quickly developed a soundtrack in my head of what the characters would be listening to. I got a kick out of this image found on the Black Metal Comic MySpace:

I unfortunately didn't find any reference to further releases for this graphic novel. Which ironically, really makes it all the more metal actually, delivering a side of disappointment. So sad. Originally released in 2007, Black Metal is ahead of its time now that Cannibal Corpse, Dimmu Borgir and Dethklok have their comics. There are plenty of hints to a sequel, but as far as my internet sleuthing is concerned, it stops at that. I consumed this puppy in 30 minutes flat and am now seriously fiending for more.

Dont' take my word, though. Skip to the 3:00 mark:

The book is currently sold out on the Oni Press site, but you can find it on good ole Amazon here.

Favorite Albums of the Year

2009-08-24T22:21:00.006-05:00

Although there are still a few months to go, the majority of the year has past, which means more than likely the majority of the new albums have been released. While I can't put all my cards on the table quite yet in terms of "favorite albums of the year," I can say definitively that Kylesa's Static Tensions is definitely one of my favorites so far and is the best Kylesa album yet.

I've heard every one of Kylesa's albums as well as the majority of guitarist Philip Cope's previous band, Damad. For a while I preferred Damad for their more punky, diy aesthetic and amazing female vocals. It seemed Kylesa was just another version of Damad that never really caught up. Static Tensions however, moves Kylesa clear into their own category and establishes a vocabulary all its own.

I literally played the CD to death in about three months after getting it at their last tour with SXSW. At first it just seemed like a more melodic version of everything they'd done, but upon further listening the dialogue of the two drummers with Laura and Philip's more disciplined guitar playing made this album more than just that "sludgy, metal, progressive" moniker this band is so easily identified as. The excellent production values definitely help as a keen ear has moved all the parts into the right place.

While most people probably won't groove on Kylesa nearly as much as I have, this album definitely is a milestone in their discography. It seems less nervous, more assured, and more confident in emotion and ability. The musicianship matures as it sheds some of its punkiness and incorporates some progressive elements. It seems Kylesa is all growns up and found a lexicon all their own.

Check 'em out:
http://www.kylesa.com/
http://www.myspace.com/kylesa
At Prosthetic

I must also point out the amazing artwork by John Dyer Baizley as a collaboration between him and Phillip Cope. You may recognize him from band artwork for Baroness, Skeletonwitch, Torche, Black Tusk, even Magrudergrind.
http://www.myspace.com/johndyerbaizley

Apocalyptic Havoc Video

2009-08-24T21:51:00.004-05:00

One of the best albums of the year so far has no doubt been Goatwhore's Carving Out the Eyes of God (see previous). The album has impressed critics, inspired a bevy of fans and made those who knew Goatwhore before turn diehard.

Posted last week is the first video from the first track of their new album. I just checked it out and had the following realizations:

1) Holy shit these guys have tightened their game. Something happened between here and there and they found a great mix of thrash/black/rock. I want to go get in a fight now.

2) I love the sweat and grease you can see on these guys during the video. Most metal videos (especially the black/viking variety) are out in the freeze-your-ass-off cold. Coming from Houston, I think I'd rather vacation in the Amazon sooner than spend any significant time in snow. I'm glad they stuck to their swampy roots. Reminds me of home.

3) Playing blazing fast guitar solos in the heat and humidity of the Gulf Coast is bad enough. Slapping a giant studded leather arm band means you don't fuck with the Goatwhore.

4) Consider the last two comments and the fact that these guys tour like madmen, I can't imagine what their van smells like.

5) Ben Falgoust has great hair.

6) Where the hell is the bass player in this video? We've got good coverage of guitar solo, plenty of wide shots and close-ups of vocals, and a few double bass shots. Where the hell is the 4-string?

7) Just enough CG to keep an interest. The treatment does just enough and then lets the song shine through, so good job on the director and editor's part.

8) Time to watch it again.

Updates

2009-08-23T15:44:00.003-05:00

The quality of this blog is inversely proportional to the amount of my paycheck. I'm totally calling the age old blogger "I don't have enough time" excuse as of late. That said, I've got plans for a site redesign, more interviews and album reviews through Direct Metal Music and some review reviews. There's a ton of shows coming to the capital city, too. As always cheesy as fuck nonsense to keep it going. Like this:

Lest We Forget

2009-08-23T15:38:00.003-05:00

Some sweet interviews with some of the who's who of 90s death metal and some right wing nut jobs sprinkled in between. They don't make them like they used to

Gorguts covering Autopsy

2009-08-23T15:16:00.004-05:00

Both playing MDF. Doesn't get much better than that.

Coffee Sells... But Who's Buying?

2009-08-16T20:53:00.003-05:00

Dave Mustaine. An endless source of entertainment in different forms. This time, Dave worked his magic in form of: purveyor of coffee! Er rather, former purveyor of coffee. Guess he didn't have as much success as Dethklok in the fields of java.

I just checked out this news story via Blabbermouth about Dave Mustaine phasing out his coffee brand. Yes. Dave Mustaine has his own coffee. Who knew?

The best part of the story isn't even that he oddly has his own brand of coffee (or that there are matching coffee tumblers), or that the blends are hilarious ("Dave Mustaine's Peruvian Blend." You're kidding, right?), but the smart ass comments left after the story. The ability of metalheads to be complete relentless dicks makes me so proud. Here are a few gems in response:

"Coffee sells, but who's buyin'?"
"Coffee is his business and business is bad"
"I guess his coffee business can rust in peace..."
"That coffee tasted like 'Ashes in your mouth.'"
"I guess I'll no longer be able to enjoy his dark 'Roast in Peace.'" (

What can I say? I'm a fan of the cheesy humor.

Faust Interview. No. Seriously.

2009-08-16T19:20:00.008-05:00

Who knew good things came to those who give smart ass opinions? I didn't. At least not until I ended up getting a sweet ass hook-up with Direct Metal Music a few weeks back and thereby a sweet ass hook-up deeper into the world of metal. One being the opportunity to interview Bård ”Faust” Eithun. No. Seriously.

Now, if you've happened to have read or seen or heard or been exposed to pretty much any information about the history of Norwegian black metal, this name should ring a bell. You most likely know Faust from his work in Emperor or as one of the "co-founders" of the second-wave of Norwegian metal making headlines in the 90s. There's a few other things in there but never mind that.

He's also obviously one of those people that are machines with their craft and never seem to take a day off from being creative. I personally can't relate to that at all since even looking at his discography tires me the fuck out. His most recent group, Blood Tsunami, is his most recent outlet. Their new album, Grand Feast For Vultures , was released this past April and kicks thrashy ass. Way more than their first record released in 2007.

So way to go Norway. Make the rest of the world look pithy with your ability to not only produce the greatest black metal, but also some damn fine thrash. Geez.

Check the interview with Faust here:
http://www.directmetalmusic.com/blood-tsunami.html

Oderus Urungus Interviews Oderus Urungus

2009-08-09T10:09:00.006-05:00

Either it's the slowest news month in existence (it is August) or Oderus Urungus is on fire.

I should clarify by saying I don't own any Gwar albums or particularly care about Gwar except for the fact that they're funny as hell and any show where people can go get covered in goo of various natures is worth having around in my book. His interviews lately however, have been delightfully entertaining. As featured on NewsCreep.com, here's Oderus talking smack (as all good celebrities should do) about Kerry King, Bono, and show biz, interviewed by none other than Oderus:

Evisceration Plague

2009-08-09T09:49:00.003-05:00

Cannibal Corpse has just released a new comic titled after their latest album, Evisceration Plague. I initially decided I wouldn't buy the album thinking it would be just another album to add to the Cannibal Corpse discography, but apparently it's actually got some new stuff going on and is worth checking out. The video for the title track is really killer. As far as metal videos go it's pretty simple, but in that regard really lets the song be the hero and the simple yet gruesome story only complement the song (what videos should do).

Anyway, the comic release has definitely sparked my interest in the album again since A) I'm a fan of Cannibal Corpse and B) I'm a fan of comics. Awesome! The only problem is it's only available at Hot Topic. Damn you Cannibal Corpse. Damn you. I could always order this online but that's really just one step removed from setting foot in the god forsaken entity that is consumer branding. I'm secretly hoping the comic sucks so I won't feel bad for missing out, but since it was done by Vince Locke (long time artist for the band and the world of comics at large) I'm pretty sure it's going to be 96 pages of Cannibal Corpse covers. Unless someone lets me borrow a copy I guess I'll have to wait for it on ebay.

Hirax Lives!

2009-08-09T09:39:00.002-05:00

This year seems to have been pretty good for seeing older acts come out of the woodwork. Next up on the list is Hirax, coming to Austin on the 29th of this month. Vocalist Katon W. de Pena is the only original member left, but as long as they shred and play Hell on Earth I'll be a happy camper. Here's a video of a recent show. I'm so pumped:

It Has Begun

2009-07-29T16:06:00.004-05:00

The robots are starting their evil metal-y plot to take over the world. Or at least take over Sweden. The Local, which brands itself as the "Sweden's News in English," announced today a Swedish company has been sued approximately $3,000 after a robot attacked an employee A robot. Attacked. An employee. Apparently the man was working on the metal assassin when it received a signal from Skynet and proceeded to grab the mans head. The worker managed to fend off the attack but sustained four broken ribs and serious injuries. I wonder if socialist health care will cover such things.

The machine, which was designed to lift heavy rocks, came to life after the man thought he had cut the power supply. I am apt to say that the man did unplug the machine but the synthetic creature had different thoughts.

And all along I would have put my money on the Japanese or Americans to invent apocalyptic cyborgs. But nooo. It's clear now that only the country who has invented not only Ikea but also Abba would be the one to destroy us.

Metal Chip Cookies

2009-07-29T14:20:00.005-05:00

Alright. I admit. I'm having a little too much fun with corpse paint on this site. I promise more to have serious substance and less cheese. Tomorrow.

Today though, it's all about the corpse paint in the form of funny YouTube videos. There's a crap load of crap on YouTube but I stumbled upon this accidentally. It's actually pretty funny.

Now with added coolness: MetalSucks.net

The Guild

2009-07-28T11:24:00.003-05:00

Call me crazy, but listening to metal and being a huge nerd seem to go hand in hand. Maybe it's the math behind the music, fantasy/escape type lyrics, or maybe because what band is on your shirt matters more than what you actually look like, but there's a fair chance your IT guy can name at least one Iron Maiden guitarist. In fact, you might be that IT guy.

It's probably because of this nerd/metal symbiotic relationship that I sat down and watched the entirety of the webisode series titled The Guild over the weekend. The show centers around Codex, played by actress and head writer Felicia Day, and the characters in her online gaming guild. One day they decide to actually meet. Hilarity ensues.

If you've ever been near any sort of RPG or MMORPG there's all sorts inside-joke gems only a gamer could appreciate. Season 2 is now out on DVD and all episodes can be viewed on the site. Season 3 is in the works and I can't wait, because the only thing better than staying up all night questing your ass off, is staying up all night watching people parody people who quest their ass off.

www.WatchTheGuild.com

Christmas in July

2009-07-24T11:43:00.002-05:00

It's July. The gift giving time of year is far far away. I don't care. This is too good not to post.

Nathan Explosion Interview

2009-07-24T09:07:00.005-05:00

With the advent of their new game, new album, and new season of Metalocalypse (now in 30 minute episodes!) announced, Dethklok are vying for the opportunity to turn everything blacker than the blackest black times infinity. I for one can't wait because the only thing better than metal is metal in cartoon form.

That's why I was reminded of this interview Brian Posehn, known metalhead and slightly known comedian, who spoke on the phone with Nathan Explosion (and interludes by Skwisgaar) circa 2007 when the first season had come out on DVD. Here's a bit of the interview:

BP: You've got some guys from the Florida death-metal scene and some guys from Norway in your band. Why does the darkest music in the world come from those two places?

NE: That's a good question, actually. Florida, I don't know. I wanna say it has something to do with Epcot Center being there.

BP: That's where all the anger and the darkness comes from—Epcot?

NE: Yeah, it's just like the Hall Of Presidents thing and the rides just make you go insane with anger. And then Norway's just depressing. I think it's like 50 percent of the population is depressed. And the other 50 percent, they're kind of douchebags. So you're either depressed or just annoying.

BP: So, just depressed douchebags, pretty much?

NE: I don't know. I don't know that much about Norway. But, you know, I know where it is. Kind of. It's Scandinavian to me where it is—meaning I don't know where it is.

BP: But why not Fresno? Are there any other death-metal cities that we don't know about? Places full of depressed douchebags?

NE: I don't know. I think there are places that are more brutal than Norway.

BP: Where's the most brutal place you've been?

NE: San Jose, maybe. There's just, like, Applebee's and, you know, Starbucks and strip malls.

BP: Do you think the next Dethklok might come from San Jose?

NE: It's definitely possible. I think Illinois could breed the next Dethklok. Southern Illinois. Any place that's really humid could breed the next… I mean, that's brutal. The most oppressive thing is the horrible, horrible, muggy weather.

BP: That's where the anger and the darkness comes from?

NE: There's a term called "oppressive weather" that meteorologists use. And when you're sick of being oppressed, you just say "Fuck this, I've had enough! I've gotta start a fuckin' metal band!"

For the rest of the interview and sound clips, visit the AV Club here.

Gore Not Core

2009-07-23T18:54:00.003-05:00

This new trend of metalcore or screamocore or crabcore or whatever the hell the kids are calling it nowadays certainly has been creating abuzz in the metal world's gossip columns- myself included. Cattle Decapitation has been wielding the answer for all us old folk scratching our heads. Behold. The Gore Not Core shirt design:

And... that about sums it up. Although it's been out for a while, it only seems apropos to make this the shirt of the summer.

The bands latest release titled, "The Harvest Floor" from Metal Blade Records came out this January and I for one think it's pretty damn good. The bands sound has changed quite a bit over the years with lineup changes and such, but overall the signature veggie gore is pretty tight. Vocalist Travis Ryan is definitely a sight to behold live. Here's a video of his time in the studio recording the album making all sorts of gorey noises:

The shirt and other like it can be found here.
http://www.cattledecapitation.com

Black Sabbath Goes to the Movies

2009-07-23T18:14:00.003-05:00

Metal Insider via The Hollywood Reporter has announced Tony Iommi will be starting a new gig. The guitarist has just signed a deal with Mike Fleiss, (who we can all thank for such gems as The Bachelorette, High School Reunion and the remakes of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre) and will head up the music for his horror franchise titled the all original Black Sabbath.

I'll be interested to see if the name sticks as it's come under some heat lately (thank you, Ozzy & Sharon). And while I certainly can't expect these films will be any good as the producer seems to have a knack for ripping things off and certainly for contributing more garbage to the world, they might have some killer soundtracks.

Master Interview

2009-07-22T17:43:00.004-05:00

I'd like to think I've met some "important" people in my time. Presidents, actors, athletes. Most of the time I walk away unphased. No biggie. Sitting down with "Master" Paul Speckmann however, seemed to make me as nervous as whore in a church. It probably has something to do with the fact that although the man is a living legend and has cranked out some of heaviest riffs I've ever heard, he doesn't seem to know it. And if he does, hides it under the most cool, down to to earth demeanor.

Check out my interview and many more less- nervous interviews at Direct Metal Music

Corpsepaint Pic of the Day

2009-07-19T17:41:00.005-05:00

Corpse paint flash. Better to plan your shit than wind up with a mess of muddled gray on your face.

Thanks to HatewarE at Deviant Art for the stolen art.

MDF VIII

2009-07-19T17:34:00.001-05:00

If you've ever noticed the lineup for any number of European festivals, you would know that they pretty much kick America's ass when it comes to amazing lineups. Well, America's answered back this time around announcing Friday that the legendary Autopsy will be headlining an impressive slew of bands for next years festival. Although officially disbanded as of fourteen years ago, Autopsy will be reuniting to make Baltimore the most metal city in the world next May.

The rest of the lineup is sure to get any death metal fan off their ass and start saving for airfare:

ENTOMBED (Sweden)
EYEHATEGOD
OBITUARY
PENTAGRAM
SINISTER (Netherlands)
MELECHESH (Netherlands)
INCANTATION
PORTAL (Australia)
HAEMORRHAGE (Spain)
COFFINS (Japan)
IMPALED
GRIDLINK
BIRDS OF PREY
INGROWING (Czech Republic)
GRIDE (Czech Republic)
JESUS CROST (Netherlands)
16
MASSGRAVE (Canada)
FUCK THE FACTS (Canada)
TOMBS
HOWL

More great bands to come!
Check out http://www.supremebrutality.com for current postings and information.

Andrew W.K. on Morals

2009-07-19T16:23:00.005-05:00

Although he's been out of the mainstream limelight for a few years, Andrew W.K. has managed to make a few headlines lately. Clips from his recent appearance on the Fox News show Red Eye, with guest Oderus Urungus from Gwar, have been making the viral rounds.(see clip). Apparently the 3am show knows who its target audience is as both Oderus and Andrew are regular guests.

Mercyful Fate for your Feet

2009-07-16T12:06:00.008-05:00

The subculture of heavy metal has a vast array of different group identities and accessories to help define them. There's the perennial kutte, drinking horns, corpse paint, studded arm bands, not to mention leather boots. Now, there's King Diamond and Mercyful Fate shoes. Better believe it.

The shoes feature cover art from what looks like Abigail and Don't Break The Oath

Check out C1RCA Combat shoes at: http://www.c1rcacombat.com/

Like, What Do You Mean?

2009-07-16T08:52:00.013-05:00

Alright. Get comfy. This one's lengthy.

Lately I've been catching myself moaning about the "youth of today." (And no, not the band.) Thinking things like "those damn lousy kids don't appreciate the good old days (read: when music stores existed)," asking myself "these people are actually going to run the planet someday?" and most often, "get off my damn lawn, you pesky kids!" Makes me wonder if I'm really that old and jaded. Then I ran across this gem from Hard Times:

Attack Attack Interview HARDTIMES.CA

So. Am I surprised? No, not really. Shocked? "You betcha," as Sarah Palin would say.

A few things come to mind:

1) People don't know what work is anymore. You poor dear. A national tour. Ohhh the pains of life.

2) Maybe I don't hate all teenagers. Just any ones that have sympathy for anything related to "crabcore." Being proud of this is like being proud of the fact you don't pay rent because you live with your mom.

3) This band is totally Christian. Saying that just because the lyrics are Christian doesn't mean it's a Christian band is like saying Gorgoroth isn't Satanic just because every lyric is Satanic or they performed a Black Mass on stage.

4) The public school system is worse off than the banking system at the moment.

5) Speaking of the public education system, did anyone catch that this guy is the VOCALIST? i.e.- he writes the lyrics. Seriously. He has a message he wants to convey through the wonder of words. Yet, the boy can't form a complete sentence and he seems okay with that.

Henceforth, I looked up some Attack Attack! lyrics to see what these guys raison d'etre is, if you will. From the song "What Happens If I Can't Check My MySpace When We Get There?"

Come on.
Lay down your head,
And sleep with me tonight,
Lay in this bed.
Recall the black book, I'll forget you.
Complaining to myself to leave this,
Behind my smile, will be a lie,
For why you are gone.
Come on have some selfless-ness,
Don't give into arrogance.
Sleep with peace tonight,
(I'm waiting for the day)
We're gonna win this fight.

Sweet. Crabcore about abstinence. I bet 14-year old girls eat that up. Something tells me they're from the midwest. Christian propaganda under the veil of combovers.

Maybe I was onto something with the youth of today thing.

For the funniest and scariest thing you'll see all day, check out: http://www.myspace.com/attackattack

Metal Twins

2009-07-10T12:39:00.005-05:00

Also seen at:
http://www.metalsucks.net/category/what-the-fuck/

Breakfast of Champions

2009-07-09T22:18:00.007-05:00

Ever since listening to that first Motörhead album years and years ago, I've pretty much been the biggest Lemmy fan on the planet. The man can do no wrong in my book. To this day their songs inspire me to drink, party, fuck, and rock harder. This video goes to show that the man is not only still human, but still rocks more before dinner time than every deathcore band combined.

Apparently I'm not the only one who loves the Kilmister, either. Check out the upcoming documentary below:
http://www.lemmymovie.com/
Or feel free to buy me his action figure here.

And if you're like me and can't get enough of Motörhead, here's a vintage video of Lemmy and Animal acting the way rock stars should act somewhere in France:

Goatwhore's Carved Out a Damn Fine Record

2009-07-08T14:09:00.007-05:00

In case you haven't heard, Goatwhore's new album "Carving Out the Eyes of God" is awesome. Really. Really. Awesome. And that is an awesome thing because there's plenty of new albums that aren't.

I was honestly a bit hesitant about this album after hearing an interview with lead vocalist Ben Falgoust months ago where he mentioned the albums was a mix of black metal and rock and roll, but all hesitation is gone. By "rock and roll," he must have meant that the guitars get loud and in your face, the blast beats and drums never stop, and the vocals tie it all up. They've turned down the black and turned up the thrash, which turns out to be a damn catchy mix in this case.

There's a lot of hype out there for this album right now- and I'll vouch that all the good stuff is true. I'll also say that I'm damn proud to have some gulf coast dudes represent the US in blackened death metal. Every personal story I've heard about Goatwhore has been a positive one, which is to say I'm glad to see their hard work is starting to pay off. And by hard work I mean they tour like madmen. In fact, they're probably be stopping by your town sometime soon on their current Conquer & Curse Tour with Abigail Williams and Daath to sing the praises of Satan.

Tour info., merch, and a track from the new album available at:
http://www.myspace.com/goatwhore

Check out the Metal Blade Records page here.

AV Club Say What?

2009-07-08T12:40:00.004-05:00

Well I'll be. The Onion, known to all college-campuses and liberal towns everywhere as "the funny free newspaper," has bellied up to the metal bar. Who knew.

As of June, Leonard Pierce, former writer for Metal Edge magazine began his once-a-month- column detailing the happenings of all things metal. Published as part of the AV Club, which normally details bands in the "whiny" genre, The Metal Box runs downs the highlights of releases the metal world over.

July's column was just posted and features everything from Goatwhore, Morbid Angel, Amon Amarth, and even Manowar. There's a bunch of stuff in between of which shall not be mentioned, too. But hey- at least a purveyor of pop culture is even slightly acknowledging the fact that metal is alive and a very worthwhile and newsworthy culture.

Check out the metal box here and be sure to talk some shit on the forum:
http://www.avclub.com/features/metal-box/

Hot Dogs are Metal

2009-07-03T16:42:00.012-05:00

While metal is above all supreme and transcendent, there is a special holiday among us that deserves a moment.

On this July 4th weekend, we celebrate the final revision and approval of the Declaration of Independence by Congress 233 years ago. This may be a fact, but it is certainly not why American celebrate the 4th of July. There's more to it than that boring Continental Congress crap. There's an excuse for us to have a huge crazy party, get drunk, blow shit up, and forget differences to come together to hate on those bloody stifling British.

Lest we forget the most important aspect of Independence Day perhaps above all else:

The 93rd annaul Nathan's Famous Fourth of July International Hot Dog Eating Contest.

Where last year, Joey Chestnut edged out Takeru Kobayashi for the honor and glory by eating a total of 64 hot dogs in ten minutes.

Because we all know it. Americans love food. A lot. Especially hot dogs. So it's only appropriate that for 10 glorious glutton-filled minutes, we rejoice in men and women doing the impossible task of filling every body cavity they can find full of beef and hot dog buns.

So this 4th of July weekend, I find a sense of pride knowing that without the founding fathers and our separation from Britain, America would never have risen to be the hot dog gurgitation capital of the universe. Hail America.

http://www.nathansfamous.com/

Noteworth Band: Cripper

2009-07-02T14:09:00.011-05:00

Cripper, from Hannover German, is another female fronted death metal group to add to the list of great bands. Gaining a momentum of success as of late, the band has released another album this past June 19, not to mention a steady stream of increasingly large tour dates and festivals.

The band contributes to the current "thrash revival" with a thick coating of power chords and catchy riffs. These guys know their early 80s California thrash well but trade speed for melodic tones in the translation across the ocean. The formula comes of as some truly catchy yet simple riffs to sink your teeth into. Not to mention Britta's raw and well controlled death vocals. This band seems pretty young, so I can't wait to see what further projects and development they come up with.

http://www.myspace.com/cripperthrash

Oldest Rocker in Town

2009-07-02T13:58:00.003-05:00

Now this one is an oldie but a goodie. Really old, actually. 82 years in fact.
I forget how I stumbled across this short clip about an octogenarian heavy metal fan, but I lust for his album collection.
Check it out here.

Fenriz Has A Blog

2009-07-01T12:35:00.006-05:00

I'm so glad MySpace exists. There. I said it. People can moan all they want, but where else can you explore new bands from all over the world for free?

So a couple weeks ago cruising the MySpace, I stumbled upon the blog of Fenriz of the mighty Darkthrone. Every week Fenriz himself posts a blurb and a link- usually to a band's MySpace page- detailing finds on the interwebs.

Every link I've checked out has kicked ass. Some more than others, but the man has excellent taste (duh). It seems that the general sound of most bands is either black metal or borders the crust/metal/blackened death metal sound, but they really run the gamut. I have absolutely no idea how he finds these bands since they're hidden in a small pocket of the universe. Perhaps it has something to do with the woods in Norway. Regardless, it's worth checking out at Darkthrone's MySpace blog below.

http://blogs.myspace.com/officialdarkthrone

Suffocation Rules

2009-06-30T11:56:00.005-05:00

Best album of the year? Maybe. Definitely in the running!

Suffocations new album is set to release July 14 through Nuclear Blast records and let me tell you it kicks more ass than a couple of donkeys at an MMA match. It has been streaming on their MySpace for a week or two now and I can't get enough of it. The songs have the trademark Suffocation sound: Excruciatingly good musicianship, strong, consistent vocals and guitars riffs that will make your head explode. So... pretty much what you'd expect.

However, the nice thing is that there's a great amount of head bangability to this album for being so technically masterful. A lot of bands seem to lose melody over mastery, but in Suffocation's sixth album everything seems to have fallen together into one big evil tub of awesome.

Be sure to check out tour dates listed on their MySpace as part of the Summer Slaughter Tour

http://www.myspace.com/suffocation

New Behemoth

2009-06-23T12:37:00.006-05:00

Polish black metal kings Behemoth just released the track "Ov Fire and the Void" from their upcoming album Evangelion set to release August 7 from Nuclear Blast records (thanks Niloc). The track, currently streaming on their MySpace, keeps true to the pounding double bass and blackened death metal the band is most famous for along side their apostate-themed vocals. This being the bands 9th studio album and nearly two-decade long career, I'll be interested to see if Behemoth has any surprises up their thick black leather sleeves.

This new album accompanies the upcoming Rockstar Mayhem Fest starting later this month featuring some awesome and more than a few not so awesome, er, really bad bands. Check out international and US tour dates on their MySpace listed below.

www.behemoth.pl/
www.myspace.com/behemoth
www.nuclearblast.de

Corpsepaint Pic of the Day

2009-06-22T21:32:00.004-05:00

More like "Corpsepaint WTFing hell of the day." This happened a while ago, but in case you haven't heard or buried it deep in your psyche and needed me to remind you, some superstar fashion designer down in Brazil decided enough of the normal "inspirations" for his show like sparkles or purple yarn and put his money on black metal. That means tan, svelte model types (and one beefy guy... how'd he get in?) all done up to look like they just walked out of Helvete wrapped in trash bags. Seeing Darkthrone in corpsepaint isn't so scary as it is a familiar and rather soothing... but this is just too damn creepy!

Oh the horror. The horror: http://herchcovitch.uol.com.br/

New Asphyx album!

2009-06-22T12:53:00.004-05:00

The new Asphyx album is out!!!!
The new Asphyx album is out!!!!
The new Asphyx album is out!!!!

After seeing these guys blow pretty much every band off the stage at MDF, I am more excited about this album than the prospect of paint balling Austin hipsters... and I am really excited about that. Everything I've listened to so far kicks ass.

Get it here: http://www.nuclearblast.de/
Listen to it here: www.myspace.com/officialasphyx

Also on the horizon for this week: Korpiklaani's new album drops the 26th!

History of the Heavy Metal Logo

2009-06-22T12:37:00.006-05:00

Heavy metal typography is one of those things that makes extreme metal that much more awesome. Helvetica hath no fury if you know what I mean. Check out this comic strip detailing the progression of spiky br00tal letters. The last one is especially familiar:

Check out more original facts and beyond here: http://leonbeyondfacts.blogspot.com/

Requiem Metal Podcast

2009-06-15T17:22:00.007-05:00

I listen to a ton of music. At least a full time jobs worth per week give or take shows and movies. Sometimes I crave a little something different, though. Enter the concept of the podcast. Great to kill those hours at work and even a little informative.

Requiem Metal Podcast is by far the best extreme metal focused podcast I've found hands down. Described as "NPR-style... Imagine Charlie Rose and the Car Talk guys talking about metal," each week is about 90 minutes of bands you love, bands you like, and some bands you may not be familiar with hosted by Mark Rudolph and Jason Hundey. Every show features the bands discography along with interjections of stories about their personal experiences and random tidbits. I learn something new or at least agree with the opinions of every show.
I found the podcast about a month ago and have taken in about a half dozen or so shows. They take each band from its beginning and follow it through hitting the high points with music to guide the way. It's eerily reminiscent of conversations I've had with friends about bands which is to say, these guys are definitely fans.

There's a little bit for everyone. Bathory, Carcass, Death, Enslaved, Sepultura, Pig Destroyer- even Dokken. If you can't find anything of interest here I'd be willing to bet you live under a rock in the middle of Greenland. Best of all- it's free.

Check it out at http://requiempodcast.com

Don't Fuck with the Metal Spiky Bits

2009-06-13T13:01:00.006-05:00

I live next to a douche. The kind of douche that's okay blasting his crap music at extremely inappropriate hours while the rest of us have to get up and work. This fucker operates through rain, sleet, snow, gloom or night. Cops, no cops. It doesn't seem to matter.

Lucky for me I got a kick ass set of speakers for XXXmas. Today was the day I really opened em up and saw what they could do.

I also had too good of a time compiling a playlist for my special friend. I call it my "gitmo experience" soundtrack. Here's what he got to hear while he wanted to sleep his poor little hangover off:

1) Cannibal Corpse- Hammer Smashed Face
2) Cannibal Corpse- I Eat Cum
3) Metallica- Battery
4) Judas Priest- You've Got Another Thing Comin (No seriously. You have another thing comin)
5) Napalm Death- Necessary Evil
6) Carcass- Exhume to Consume
7) Napalm Death- Multinational Corporations
8) Extreme Noise Terror- Statement
9) Cattle Decapitation- Everyone Deserves to Die (SRSLY)
10) Carpathian Forest- In League with Satan (You better believe it)
11) Judas Priest- Breaking the Law
12) Dethklok- Go Forth and Die (I'm not joking)
13) Napalm Death- Suffer the Children
14) Phobia- Sickening Discretion
15) God Dethroned- Under a Darkening Sky (Something old, something new...)
16) Metallica- Master of Puppets
17) Dio- Rainbow in the Dark
18) Motorhead- Ace of Spades

And there you have it. A bit over an hour of some of my favorite melodies I felt like sharing since he was gracious enough to introduce me to his. ;)

I'm a nice person. Really.

Metal Twins

2009-06-09T18:21:00.004-05:00

Susan Gerl- God Dethroned

Donna- That 70s Show

Corpse Paint Pic of the Day

2009-06-08T21:16:00.004-05:00

Immortal and a huge invisible sandwich.

If anyone knows where to get a pair of those boots let me know.

Check them out at: www.immortalofficial.com/

Metal Bits

2009-06-08T21:09:00.007-05:00

I never ever tire of George "Corpsegrinder" Fisher. Especially when he talks about World of Warcraft.

Fuck the Alliance!

Iron Maiden: Flight 666

2009-06-08T20:31:00.007-05:00

When a band reaches a certain zenith of awesomeness, one can't help but wonder if the people in that band are actual humans, or complete SOB's. One might think that a band who arguably impacted the world of metal more than any other would be complete dickheads. I know I would be if I wrote any one of their songs. As it turns out however, they seem like pretty fucking cool guys and as down to earth as someone who tours in their own plane can be.

Exhibit A:
Exhibit B: Complete with Eddie on their tail!
Exhibit C: We could've seen this one coming: Aces High anyone?

Iron Maiden- Flight 666 which aired on VH1 over the weekend documents the travels of the band in their Somewhere Back in Time World Tour. Any self respecting Maiden fan will definitely need to add this to the repertoire and any self respecting friend of said Maiden fan best keep this in mind for birthdays, bar mitzvahs, the odd wedding gift or just because.

The DVD drops tomorrow and can be found at your local Amazon retailer here.